Am i ready to commit suicide?

Suicide is not the answer. It is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. 18 is a very stressful and depressing age for many people, and a lack of love will definitely not help that. However, you have your whole life ahead of you, and things are bound to get better for you soon. Your brother doesn't have the right to control you the way he does, so just live the way you want, and don't worry about his judgements. Love will come in time - so right now, just try to love yourself, and the world you live in. It can actually be a very fantastic place if you put yourself in the right mindspace :)